One thing about life, and that's you can't ever know what's coming around the corner. On the 11th of July we received a call that my former father-in-law had unexpectedly passed away. Turns out he had heart disease and he didn't know it because he hadn't been to a doctor in decades. He laid down to go to sleep and never woke up. He died of a heart attack.

That unexpected event sent us on an unplanned trip to Oklahoma for the funeral, and into one of the worst trips that I can remember. Between not having a full-fledged bed to sleep in for four nights, temps hovering at the 106-degree mark and unanticipated family tension, by the time Monday rolled around and we were scheduled to come back, none of us could wait to get back on the road and get home.

I have to be honest, I'm not much for funerals. I'm all for remembering people when they've passed, so memorial services are one thing. But things like open-casket viewing and the like make me uncomfortable. To me, the essence of the person I knew and cared about is no longer there. You can feel it, sense it. Their body is merely a shell with no animation to it any longer. At least, that's my belief. Now, it's possible they're lurking about watching the event, but as for viewing the dead body...it's not for me. I'd rather remember them for who they were, what they really looked like and how they acted the last time I spoke/visited with them.

At my former father-in-law's funeral, the military was there to salute him and offer a folded flag to his widow. Except the poor base honor guard who was charged with the folding couldn't get it right. I felt bad for her -- especially when she got to attempt number four and her superior made her unfold the flag yet again and do it over. All eyes were on her, and the silence and uncomfortable energy was palpable. Her superior's gaze was trained on her, as sharp as a razor's edge. I felt bad for the young lady. She was doing her best, but it just wasn't turning out okay. After the fourth try (if I remember correctly), her superior switched places with her and did the folding. Talk about embarrassing! I so wanted to tell her afterward that it was okay, and we know she was trying, but of course I didn't.

After the funeral and a brief visit with my former inlaws (these are the family of my first husband, who passed away in 2001), we left and traveled to Lawton, Oklahoma to visit my mom and one of my brothers. It was even hotter in Lawton, and while I was grateful for a place to stay, not having a bed was taking its toll. I ended up sleeping, upright, in a recliner. My other choices were the floor or the short loveseat.

Again, I'm grateful we didn't have to stay in a hotel, but I miscalculated my body's ability to handle going four uncomfortable nights without a bed and, consequently, sleeping only about 2 hours, max, per night. I'm an unpleasant person when I haven't gotten enough sleep, and it was difficult to control my surliness. I knew it wasn't them as much as it was me, however. I'm getting old and cranky -- I'll admit it! :)

Without going into painful detail, the overall visit was nice in spots, but tension-filled in others. I was grateful to see my mom, whom I hadn't seen in three years, and one of my brothers, whom I also hadn't seen in three years, either. One interesting excursion was a trip to two casinos in Lawton, one owned by the Comanche Nation and the other owned by the Apache tribe. As a person who has 1/8 Cherokee heritage due to my great grandmother on my mother's side, I was excited to finally visit a casino run by Native American tribes.

Finally, we made the long, ten-hour trip back home to Colorado. But the deluge of stress didn't let up upon our return. Because I'd lost 4 1/2 days of work because of our unexpected trip, I was faced with an overflowing inbox and pressure to play catch-up right away. I needed a vacation to get over the events of the past week, but there wouldn't be any of that. No, sirree Bob! When you return from a trip, it's like you have to recover from it for a full week before you feel back to normal. At least that's the way it is for me.

So the past week and a half has been all about trying to catch up (which is a fallacy, because once you dodge the first volley of tasks, another volley is already on its way). I don't smoke or drink often, but right now I feel like I could very well start. The only thing to do, I suppose, is take a deep breath (or two), keep diving in and go from there. Life is, after all, an ongoing race on many levels, after all.